Sunday, 14 December 2008

A bit of self- love there!

Things written about me in the New Sunday Times click here to read the article or get a copy it's only RM1.20, duh!

...and I'm on video

Cover story Come cook with me by

As part of its first concept store in the country, Zwilling J.A. Henkels offers its Twin Cooking Class. Classroom chef Azura Othman shows TAN BEE HONG a lively time punctuated with tips, laughs and friendly chatter

IN the midst of our conversation, Azura Othman’s mobile phone rings. She excuses herself and two minutes later, explains that the caller was her mother and bursts out laughing.
“I told her I am doing a demonstration and a Press interview right now and she wants to know if I swore,” she says. “I told her ‘no, mum, I didn’t swear’.”
The first Zwilling J.A. Henckels chef in the country, Azura has come a long way since her “swearing” days. “Yes, I used to moody,” she admits. “But not anymore. I have a different role now and I adapt to the changes. I used to cook, serve and impress customers but now my role is about educating people in the culinary arts.”
Azura has always been the kind of person who knows exactly what she wants and gets it. Only 27 years old, she is a law graduate who now dishes out advice on spices and oven temperatures instead of judicial matters. “Actually, when I was seven, I had sort of made up my mind to be a beautiful doctor or a beautiful chef,” says Azura, chuckling as she adds that the emphasis had always been on the word “beautiful”.
“I have always wanted to run a food corporation or at least have my own kitchen.”

The urge to cook became even stronger when her father passed away when she was 11 years old and her mother decided to go back to school and do her masters.
“I guess I was feeling very sad as well as worried about our finances and what would happen to me. But I wouldn’t talk about it so instead, I poured all my feelings into food,” says Azura. “I was fine as long as I had flour, eggs and sugar. I just baked and baked for my brother.”

Two years later, at age 13, she found herself packed off to boarding school in England. She spent almost all her growing years in Europe and went to law school in 1996. “I didn’t like it so I quit and went into culinary science instead,” she says. But at her mother’s insistence, she resumed her law studies in 2005 and finally graduated.

Azura has been lucky. She has worked with some of the top chefs in Europe, including Michelin chefs like Karl Obauer in Salzburg and a master p√Ętissier who’s a Culinary Olympics champion. “Actually, I think Michelin stars are overrated,” she confides. “We have so many talented chefs here in Asia, including Malaysia, but they don’t have Michelin stars. For instance, I learned the finer points of hot cooking from a local chef when I joined Regent KL’s Oggi Italian Restaurant as one of its pioneer team.”

For a while, she also lived the jet-set life. An English property tycoon loved her cooking so much he hired her as personal chef on his yacht. So, with a team of six in the kitchen, Azura cooked her way from Malaga to Ibiza. “Oh, it was a lot of fun and travelling. Often, we catered to Hollywood celebrities on board.”

A serious look clouds her face fleetingly as she admits there have been periods when her life didn’t always smell like roses. In the early days, she got yelled at often in hotel kitchens. Even her peers in culinary school gave her a rough time, sneering as they told her that she would soon quit as she was not good enough and that “a girl would never be able to make it”. But instead of deflating a fighter like Azura, such derision only served to inspire her to do well. Today, although Azura is trained in pastries, she is equally at home with all aspects of the kitchen as well as all kinds of cuisine.
Perhaps her extensive travels have stood her in good stead. She has been to places all over Europe and Asia. “I love the Indo Chine region, especially Cambodia. I get so inspired. I hope to go back in February to teach a group or orphans to bake, so they will have a skill to earn a living.”
For Azura, inspiration comes at strange hours. “Sometimes, I get nightmares and wake up. Then I’d get myself a coffee and think. Often inspiration comes at such moments,” she says, a whimsical smile lighting up her bright and cheerful face.


1 whole chicken or breasts 6 tbsp olive oil
2 yellow onions, chopped
2 cloves garlic, chopped
750g canned tomatoes, chopped
1 fresh tomato, chopped
125g canned black olives, strained Red, yellow and green capsicum
1 tsp thyme, oregano, parsley ½ cup pessilade (chopped garlic, salt, pepper, thyme and parsley)


1. Marinade chicken with freshly-ground black pepper.
2. Dice peppers, removing bitter pith.
3. Heat olive oil in deep pan and sear chicken, breast side down. Cover and let cook 7-8mins. Turn chicken over to cook back.
4. Add onions and half the garlic. Sweat onions 1-2mins and add tomatoes. Sprinkle with thyme.
5. Add peppers, olives and dash of oregano. Cook 1 minute and add parsley.
6. Cover and simmer on low heat for 8-10mins or until cooked. Serve with crusty bread.

Pour the rich chocolate pudding into ramekin moulds or espresso coffee cups.


250g cooking chocolate
5 eggs
100g butter
180ml milk
1 tsp vanilla essence
Fresh strawberries

Method: 1. Chop chocolate and put into bowl with butter and milk. Place bowl over boiling water to melt chocolate. 2. When it has melted, put aside to cool down. Add more milk if it’s too thick. 3. Add eggs, one by one, to the cool chocolate stirring continuously. Then pour into ramekin moulds or espresso coffee cups. Steam on high heat for 15 minutes. 4. Remove and allow to cool slightly. Decorate with strawberries or ice cream. To serve cold, simply put pudding in refrigerator for 1 hour.

Twin cooking classes

IT’S not new in Europe but the store at The Pavilion KL is the first Zwilling J.A. Henckels concept store in Malaysia where customers not only come in to view and buy products but they can also watch cooking demonstrations and see displays of the products in a home setting. The German brand has been producing quality knives, cutlery and kitchen ware for 227 years. “My favourite is the Professional S,” says Azura Othman who joined the company two months ago as its trainer chef. “We do demonstration classes on weekends and we have specific classes on set days,” she says. The store has an ultra-modern, fully-equipped kitchen right in the centre where Azura conducts classes. The Twin Cooking Classes, held on Fridays, are not merely cooking demonstrations nor are designed to “push” Zwilling products. Azura offers tips as she goes along and generally, it’s meant to be an afternoon of camaraderie. “I believe cooking should be fun and easy and I want to help make life easier for people who want to cook at home,” she says, grinding pepper to season a chicken. Azura is showing us how to impress family and friends this festive season with easy recipes for Chicken With Provencale Sauce and Rich Chocolate Pudding. “This is something so easy to make and so delicious you wonder why you ever bothered with turkey. If you’re just making it for yourself or your family, you can use just breasts or thighs instead of whole chicken,” she says, flipping the chicken over in the pot to sear the other side. “Smell that,” she urges, taking a deep breath herself. “It reminds me of Spain in summer.” Sadly, I can’t say if it does as I’ve never been in Spain in summer or at anytime of the year. But one sniff and I can hear my tummy growl. On Dec 19, Azura’s class is on Sweet Christmas (RM89), highlighting confections that make great gifts or as dessert — gingerbread and sticky date pudding with toffee sauce.

TWIN COOKING CLASSES Zwilling J.A Henckels Concept Store Level 6, The Pavilion, KL Tel: 03-2142 1815

Monday, 8 December 2008

I came ,I learnt,I had fun

Mr Pang and I whom I have not seen for over 10 years!!the event brought us together again!Mr Pang is the GM of Corelle Malaysia

Puan Sri Ampi talking about manners and how to entertain at home with style and grace.She is an epitome of elegance.

"The company " sponsored an event organised by a prestigious female magazine and I was there. Thanks to "Her World" for taking a good care of me on that day.I had so much fun and I met Puan Sri Ampi , the speaker on that day, who is not only gorgeous but oh! so kind and modest!I read her column on etiquette in my daily newspaper back then when I was a teenager, but to see her in person and her presentation's style is delightful.Oh! I got to do my "mini diva" stuff as well .Life is yummy! mwah mwah.

Friday, 5 December 2008

Time for a new beginning.

Very pleased to have such wonderful people in my class today!

Oh ! a new revamped blog that only changed its tag line!
By the way, few years ago I was doing quite ok with my life, I had a restaurant and I was happier until a bloody wave called Lupus came into my life and it totally changed my world.Thank you to everyone who had forgotten me and ignored me when I was ill, it showed what a terrible person you are .In this few years, lupus had broken so many things in my life.It robbed my rights to be happy and to have dreams.
But lately , I am back to cooking professionally,that is why I am always busy ,therefore I am feeling very happy now.I am myself and I will never allow anyone or anything to come in between me and cooking again.Check out my cooking classes that is packed with fun ,fun, fun and educational too!
Chef Az Azura strikes back babeyy!

Wednesday, 26 November 2008

Jalan Jalan

The picture kinda says it all, I had a GREAT weeekend and I am starting to understand the meaning of pure happiness and joy of going for a mini city tour.I enjoyed the bar hopping and talking and taking pictures , it was fun fun fun!

Hoping this weekend will treat me well.

Thursday, 20 November 2008

Attitude check

The Klang river and Jamek Mosque,Kuala Lumpur.Yes, it is irrelevant to my story,but this is my blog.Its all up to me!

Apart from thinking about how to improve the cleanliness of my beloved Bukit Bintang neighbourhood ,The possibilities of giving free drugs and treatments for Lupus patients and the mechanism of doing it and how to make my super chocolate pudding into a super duper chocolate pudding (and maybe patent it too),I still have the time to think about people and how I loath some of them (not you of course, because you are reading this).In Kuala Lumpur they are expatriates communities, lets just call them f people (no that F THAT , it stands for foreign).Being Malaysian I love all colours and I just like other people my age, don't really care about you being of other races, That is the beauty of my country and its people.

BUT I have to say that some of these F people who comes to my country to earn living can sometimes be rude towards us the locals and how they said outrageous things and making weird comments. and of course how can we forget the reputation of "white guys"in Kuala Lumpur always trying to get under my Malaysian sisters pants(but of course this issue, it takes two to tango and love ,lust and sex are blind)

I myself had spent my time in Europe but not even once that I had the courage to be rude to the locals.Just like that song from Malique said-"masuk tempat orang bawak otak bukan pisau" translation- Bring your brain and not knife when coming to to other people's place.

Few days ago, a German bloke said to me that he could get any girls he wants in this country because he is white! :o and this was at a Coffee outlet because I have decided not to give him my phone number(Monday morning is never a good morning to ask for my number and why on earth would i want to give my number to a stranger? F that!).So, I was offended by this comment, why do you have to add a racial , colour sentiment to your comments?as if you don't look stupid enough! So I added something to it ... wealthy white man not just ANY man, if you are a brain surgeon or a founder of multi million dollar company maybe I would.That shuts him off and I think I swear I could feel that his guts are shrinking and the guts are not the only part of him that is shrinking.

But then again foreigners, especially "matsalleh" the deragotary term for Caucasians have a special place in some stupid community who look at colours rather than looking at one as an individual and I feel like this people (most of them are some illiterate people who works here )who judge others by race and saying that mat sallehs are better than the locals deserve a huge slap on their face and doses of belacan to wake them up.Where I live now, I found many of them came here without working permits and still HAVE THE GUTS to say that they are consultants for this minister and that. How many mat salleh have ran out just like that without paying their rentals here where I live now? , but then again serves the landlords right for wanting- only expatriates to rent their houses.

As Ali G always say, RESPECT and I think maybe we could always do that to others regardless of their colour but most of all... from one Malay girl making a shout out to my foreigner friends, be nice when you are in my house ..especially to me.I know I'm a good host maybe its time for you to be a good guest.

Thursday, 13 November 2008

Reality bites..NOT

Old railway station Kuala Lumpur

I have practise something that I should continue doing a long time ago, I did this when I was younger but since my life was too focus on various things I had stopped doing it .

Sometimes when life is harsh even to yourself like walking in the rain from work to go home and everyone are well dressed and drinking under the roof of a fancy restaurant having a warm meal with their dates and all you think about is to reach home just to have a warm shower and to make it even worse when life is also harsh to others you find that homeless man is still smoking grass, you feel like all the apples and warm meals that you had been giving him all this while have gone to waste since he never wants to change or those foreign kids who begged at tourists spots and gave all their collections of money to a syndicate who abused them.Then you realized that life can sometimes be such an agony fiesta that serves only pain and feeling of hopelessness.
So today, I said to myself,I try to make changes,a.k.a sometimes I think I'm a bit of a busybody ,i should not really be bothered with other peoples lives ..there are more or less 6,602,224,175 of people in this world! besides,I can't even solve my sets of problems!

Close your eyes so you wont feel them , they don't need to see you cry

So this is my method of doing it... whenever I feel sad and wanting to cry, I shut my eyes real tight.and think of those sweet memories the real sweet ones that could give you brain diabetes and I listed a few so I can run them in my head like a slide show of memories

How does my hair look?

they consists of

1)When my mum always took me shopping when I was 4, it was really fun when its only mum and me joyriding on a Volvo 240 going to boutiques and restaurants and hair salon,I had my hair washed and blow dried too!I remember always giving fashion advices to my beautiful mother and always being kissed by her.

2)Being in my late father's loving hugs every time he came back from his missions, I can still smell the korus and Paco Robanne and how in contrary to that , today ,these are the smell that I loathe (maybe because at one time , want to forget him so I won't feel so sad, no matter how hard I tried I can never forget my father but since months ago I said to myself I never wanted to forget him anyway , I want him to be in my heart forever )

3)Cycling with my little brother on our BMXs
under the frangipani tree., he have always been really good with bicycle and cars and anything mechanical.He hardly know this, but the reason that i gave him hard times sometimes was because I was jealous as he is good at everything he does, everything I have always wanted to be.(Talented,Popular, musical, tall and oh so intelligent and sporty)

3)First time in London as a little girl, its funny but I still remember that when i thought when you go to London you can see superman and all the other action figure heroes as they all lived in London.

4)Our old house was fun when all of our friends came by and we played the piano and sang and eat and eat and play with other kids.

5)When my mum baked cakes in the kitchen and me and my brother always get to use our fingers and ate the batter , and excitedly waited in front of the oven.

I replayed those memories in my head over and over again and it made me smile, and I start to think that life is indeed alright,its not all sad and melancholic. My roller coaster ride so far is thrilling and fun!

Sunday, 9 November 2008

Look up and smile


-I want to watch the new bond movie and i would want to watch them real soon with my mum.
-I want to plan a trip to a place I have always wanted to go.
-I want to ake the best chocolate pudding , richer and better than the last one I made.
-I am tired but i am happy .
-I am happy and even if I have to write this 100 more times,I would.I am very happy today ,Life is kind to me at this moment.

I love you , I love me,I love life

Tuesday, 4 November 2008

Under the Azure sky

I am not sure if anyone will be reading this after I threw off my tantrums and left the other day.For what reason ? let's just forget it , kiss me now, let me make it up to you.

My heart is heavy as usual with work , things to do and menus to plan(so you know when you need a caterer, who you should call?) but now it is heavier.

Pleased to meet you
My thought are with a friend that I met a year ago at the chemist , she happens to have Lupus too and we both being the steroids (prednisolone )junkie get along pretty well,we meet occasionally for just coffee at Gloria jean's or Chocolate fudge topped sundaes at McDonald's (Yes, I hear you ...I'm a chef and I do eat at fast food chain , that's an addiction that I couldn't change.)- "L" is Sweet person, she has been going out with this guy "TJ" for 10years and he was there for her when she was ill and she was in a coma in 2005.I am amazed by love so strong, with the boy's honesty and loyalty,They are so cute together .Now,Where on earth can I get such love nowadays ?, "only available for limited customers only"I presume.He is an engineer and she literally stay at home because she was always ill, she went to secretarial school, but decided to stay at home helping her father with his business.Although knowing this person for such a short time , I felt close to her, we are both in the same age and decided to not let Lupus eat us alive, we will fight and we will live like others,I remember that I laughed out loud listening to TJ's jokes at McDonald's in Ampang and how L thinks I have such a cute laugh , she would be the first person who thinks like that because honestly, I think mine is more like a witchy laugh , though I have to admit that when I laugh,... I laugh with all of my heart and easily too!.

And two weeks ago,I had a call early in the morning ,the day I planned to ring and see if she gets better,her mum said my friend died , she had a fever and suddenly she went to sleep and never wake up.NOW,what am I suppose to say to that?I cried and we went to visit her family who were mourning.
But tell me how am I suppose to act like now?, she was like a reflection to me, apart from her kidney condition due to Lupus , we are pretty much the same.

It was a humbling experience to visit the deceased home,Looking at her belongings and sad parents, on the way back from her residence, I saw the trees with its branches covering the road like a canopy ,I looked up and saw the sunlight peeping in between the leaves, Yes I cried to every occasions, including this one while I tried to puke this pain away , pain in my throat ... it felt like sorrow, a deep thick stabbing sorrow that was stuck in me.I started to ask questions of life and death, of humans emotions of joy and pain and what if Lupus strikes and make me paralyzed again?

My reflection...

I pray for her... I am alive and I will continue this journey and that vow, It is kept in my heart with a promise not to give up, not to think too much and to live and to laugh .. after all , a friend ,somewhere up there thinks that my laughs are cute.

Thursday, 18 September 2008


This is my 200th post! woohoo!
I just need to tell you all something.Many things had happened in my life this one year and now I won't be here for a long time as I am starting a new project in my life.
So Selamat hari Raya in advance , and hope we will see each other again real soon.I am not giving up writing this blog and I'll be back once everything is fine.
Pray for my health and happiness please.
Love means we will never be apart,
I love you and I always will.


Rat and Squirrel

So many times mummy said to me- Azura darling,... this is how it is, tragic or not tragic ,this is your life stop whining and deal with it!I had been keeping it all to myself until last night when my mum came to my bed to give me a kiss goodnight.Yes, I am the 28 year old girl that her mum tuck in bed.

So I told her my problems and what people did to me. with the expectation she would go and beat the hell out of them.But I got the best advice ever and starting from today I am going to tell her everything romantic or non romatic, I always shares those with her , but I think I tend to keep the bad ones to myself knowing that it will hurt her and my brother even more .

I have to announce that my weekend starts today woo hoo! and this morning on the way to the supermarket I saw a squirrel and 2 dead rats.That was pretty scary.I wonder if that series of unfortunate events were the significant sign of something that might happen to my life.Superstitious or not, now I find those incident strange especially when a squirrel sort of walk along with you and mimic your walking... I mean when I paused the squirrel paused , and when I walk again it walks with me, until I was about to cross the road he climbed on the tree.
Since my weekend starts now ,I have to admit that I crave for some green tea ice cream and maybe some popcorn in a movie.But we will see if I will or not ctach a movie with my friends or maybe just catch up with some online games I got here.Looks like tomorrow its shopping mall day again and hopefully I will see my little squirrel again.

Wishing you guys a wonderful evening, out or in I am gonna make this evening a sweet one for me. xoxox

Wednesday, 17 September 2008

I need some Sayang

Let me see how is my weekend going on , Monday was excellent, Tuesday so,so and Wednesday which is today hmmm... let me think.It is not OK , but I am keeping my optimism level at it's fullest.

I had just finished reading this book that I have always wanted to read , about a love story between a woman and her make believe invisible friend,Heart wrenching beautifully written tale.
It is called Sundays at Tiffany's by James Patterson and it is indeed a nice love story.If only everything will end up that perfect.
James Patterson wrote with his heart and I was in tears even at page 8!
After reading it , it feels so close to my heart and it is something every girl can relate too, well... every girl with an imaginary friend, I am lucky because I was an imaginative kid so I had 5 or maybe 6 friends who had tea parties with me.I forgot their names but how I wish they are with me now.Because they are a bunch of people who never hurt me ever.Yes ... I am not so- ok at the moment.

I don't know sometimes If I am taking my life too hard or people are being hard on me?.I feel that this world is filled with lies and people wearing mask.What I firstly thought was white is actually grey, and a streak of red I had spoken about,many entries before , They are actually just a streak of grey too pretending to be red.

When I was 16 someone I know told me that I have high expectations in life, and today I realized maybe a little bit.I think a little bit too much sometimes and I think the best place for me to live in is in heaven where everything is perfect and no one will ever hurt me.This world is a bad, bad place at least to me at this moment.

Heart ...they are like precious crystal and when it chips it is really hard to fix it.So friends who keep on asking me if I am doing alright in chaotic Kuala Lumpur?The answer is -This city where I was born is pretty mean to me.But what the heck, I live only once and I am not gonna let anything ruined my mood.Despite wiping this tears , I am thinking hell with it! Life goes on and leave those stupid people alone.I don't know where does this positive vibe coming from but I know I am happy about something and nothing and no one can ruin this for me.
As my friend fondly known as Yellow said - Azura STOP thinking! and carry on listening to that heart of yours.oh Uncle Yellow,... I am trying!

Sunday, 14 September 2008

When a boy makes a girl cry

A friend from afar rung me today and told(whined) me how difficult women are and how He had just been yelled at by his new girlfriend . He got confused not realizing the importance of trust a.k.a calling her everyday. Me and him we have a total platonic relation and we shares many things and just for the record ,I am allowed to share this story and view of mine with the rest of you and I know my girls who are readint this will definitely agree with me.
I think most of the problems in a relationship starts with miscommunication, Woman like me ,in this era , we are pretty straightforward , just like to cut the fuss to avoid wasting our time. See... women like me have other things to do but of course will priorities her man first because He is always in her mind , well at least for me.

As for Matthew(not real name) his problems starts when he is being selfish and not calling this new girl that He is currently dating for a week.Why ? because working as a chef is taking his time , I know... I was there working my bum off, BUT for US girls we think that you are not interested anymore or even worse with some salt and pepper of fantasy we even imagine you with another girl doing your smooth suave move.Yes! we need to be suspicious when dealing with that particular species OR we simply just wants to know how is your day and listening to your beautiful masculine voice.

Girls needs assurance like that , but practically.logically speaking it's obvious you are not into us if you do not call, it simply means she is out of my mind -kapoosh , gone, boleh belah and after liking you, knowing or just suspecting that HURTS!And we would analyze if we did any mistakes or said anything wrong, that was pretty cruel to be honest, to leave someone with a big question mark on her head.

Blame MR Bell
It's the thought that counts and telephone can give a lot of problems, especially with this mobile phones,And girls, we really need to chill sometimes too , don't go hysterical and judgmental I know because I am like that ,It's best to give the slower species some times and space and a space ship .Phone calls are expensive and MEN they are heartless and selfish maybe we can try to be that heartless trick too sometimes!

Relationship and dating was meant to be easy , why you want to see him or her if it makes you unhappy? You see that person because he/she makes your heart beat faster, your world seems brighter and happier.Because you like her , why are you making her sad? gosh! now I am confuse!

I hope with one phone call filled with apology and explanation and maybe a delicious dinner ,since Matthew is helluva good Chef (I envy you)will smooth the kinks.I am hoping that tonight is the night when you both finds love and harmony between you both.I am off to bed to start a new week tomorrow hope that I don't have to work next weekend again with all this kueh and cake orders.Wish me a great week please,I need them after last week was mean to me.

Are phone calls really that important?
for me, it is a gesture to say "hey I am thinking of you too ".I know.. we women are so fragile.

*I am definitely not Doctor Love and Matthew(it's not his real name), you so owed me a night in Shoreditch when I come visit London.xxxx

Thursday, 11 September 2008

Dangerously in love

yesterday morning I went to get some precious ingredient from my specialty supermarket, I have found that my idea , dream and something I had talked about with my brother has come true.Maybe it is not new to you guys , but for the first time i saw a girl walking while typing on her laptop, she walked and listens to her music with a headphone connected to her mac and she was literally typing with one hand holding her opened computer.Well i said to my brother on our way for our sushi dinner, that one of these days there will be a gadget that we can screw.strap up to our head or shoulder and it will be our laptop holder while we walking we type as stupid as It sounds not many people use tiny phones with Internet , maybe some like it big(screen) .
I myself has a very good relationship with my Dell laptop , I bloody love him , and would do anything for him , it is like my boyfriend now, well even my boyfriend didn't spend this much time on me, vice versa.I am online most of the time and it has taken so much space in my life.Even sometimes when I'm out I have to rush and come back to check on things like finishing my book , talking to friends, listening to music, online games and etc, that of course until I get myself an iphone one day , but no! I don't think so ,being the faithful girl I am , at the end of the day I will come back to my baby Dell and touch him all the time.I love you computer, I can't live without you.I really can't.

by the way I am of naming him something other than just- DELL any idea of suitable name?

NOTE( a very long one indeed): I have to say thanks for those love mails to me, asking me if I was OK , well I was tired and ill few days ago , but I am striving and will bounce back in no time , thanks for asking , very thoughtful.xoxo
and drum roll happy Birthday to my best friend Miss M , we went out recently and she bought me more presents(yes ! 2 presents!) for my birthday and that was 2 weeks ago , when honestly I think the best birthday present she could ever give was she coming back here and spending all her time and money for the air ticket just to spend time with me.I feel loved thanks a lot and don't teach your boyfriend to curse in this new language you are learning..not very nice miss M.With your cheekiness or not ... we all Love you !

Tuesday, 9 September 2008

Negative vibe speaking( I need a bear hug)

Guess who is down with Lupus today?
Guess who is feeling ill and added her dosage of med?
Guess who have few rashes on her right cheek due to sun exposure?
Guess who is heartbroken in silence?
Guess who is chasing datelines?
Guess who wish that she is not here but somewhere else?


I am angry , I am confuse ,I am not well and I am hating today.Cant wait for the weekend to come as if it will make any difference.

Me needs loads of ice cubes in my bath tub .

My assets

I am not putting my staffs pictures here,They will know I have a blog!Therefore, I put a picture of some cute kids.

I can't say that I am a good employer , I can be unprofessional, we are too much of a family and I am the biggest sister who can do anything I like at work.I take care of my people at least that's what my mum said.My girl the other day said " gosh boss you are too soft and nice to me" , just imagine when you STAFF said that to you , means you are seriously mushy soft !

Today, I bumped upon my former cleaner , she worked for me 4-5 years ago back then. I think she treated me and family as if its her own, cleaning the restaurant , making sure everything was not stolen by other staffs, making sure that I had eaten etc.Many years had passed,I stopped doing the business due to my illness and left for England bladi blah , cut the long story short just now on the way for my evening stroll to my favourite shopping mall to get some nutella I bumped into her, and after talking for a bit ,she said how much she miss me and wish to work for me again she got this big personality and loudness you can hear from far away , when she talk about her past ...sometimes i think she was just making it up to make it more dramatic...honestly i shook my head every time I hear her stories wondering if it is real or some storyline of a soap opera.I wish I can make some space for her at work, its just that I have to sort her immigration status since she is Indonesian who's permit is about to go off soon , so we exchange numbers and guess what ? She gave me RM 20 as a gift for my Aidilfitri celebration that is coming soon which of course I refused to take, as I know RM20 is indeed a great amount of money , BUT the gesture touched my heart,Honestly... I was literally in tears as I said goodbye and gave her a big hug.

I am pretty lucky to have staffs and ex staffs who are not only
just work but take ownership of the business and tasks given.Of course they have their bitchy moments like leaving work early to get their hair done ,or late because of heavy partying the night before , but then again we are all human and have our own bitchy moments.I personally would like to apologise to few Sous and Executive Sous Chefs for troubles and dilemmas I had caused back then, I never said this all to them but I think my Christmas and Birthday cards kinda said that.

*I would like to wish My favourite Author whom I think is one of the most brilliant author in this world Dr Kassim Ahmad, happy Birthday today ."Happy Birthday Pak Kassim, semoga dipanjangkan umur dengan kesihatan yang baik."
*And of course my blogger friend the author of a brlliant blog that is Srikanth ,its his birthday tomorrow .have a great one!

Sunday, 7 September 2008

Book+me+editing=major head and heart ache

So let's put that school days journal and other so called storybooks that I written in my exercise books just for me to read together.When it comes to think about it ,I had dreamed of being published since I was 3, soo why now... let me see because I am just plain lazy and there is no one to blame except for me.Making dream a reality is not really my asset feature.

Almost done give me few more bits of time.

I just had realized that since this one whole year and had gone through highs and lows of roller coaster's emotion, there were times I feel like breathing is such a difficult, difficult (said twice to express the intensity) task.I am tired and I am saying this with my open heart spread to you here, for you to see.I am tired T.I.R.E.D. Not having that much choice I am currently picking up those broken pieces and healing my own heart.
It feels weird when you are not living your life 100%,when I was younger I thought it was an early life crisis but now... I think 'hey early life crisis can't last this long!.

So while touching up my first novel, I realized that all this while, despite not living 100% and having a disease that makes me reconsider everything I wanted to do and to be in the future ...I am doing quite ok and surprisingly still wiring here as if I don't have any works to do! again... plain lazy

Taking one day at a time as always.

Saturday, 6 September 2008

Love, life ..Me

Just when I thought that everything is going grey from now on, here comes a streak of red on my life canvas.Opportunity coming up and meeting friends and having such an enjoyable week.I had been smiling since Wednesday, at this moment life is pretty chaotic but I think grandma was right- always put some sweetness in my life no matter how bitter it gets.
I am collecting my broken pieces of strength and power as I am feeling very tired now and I hope this time it wont lead me astray and make me disappointed again.But first, I really need to heal this blister that I got on my feet from wearing my black Mary Jane.

I think I am starting to fall in love with life all over again.

Lots of love ,
The girl who found herself again

Sunday, 31 August 2008

The chain reaction

Yes , the story and the picture are seldom related.. welcome to my blog

when you are feeling ill and have a low spirit want to fight , you want to be strong.But when you failed, You are down in the dump and it leads to chain reaction which is your nose start bleeding and your eyes blurred.I am tired and I am sleepy all the time.I tried sleeping but when I got up my temperature risen.I am not well.Healing my spirit and soul now.

Lupus 1 Azura 0

Friday, 29 August 2008

Me ,my nagging .... a blog

Starting from today, I will be very busy with finishing and touching up my first ever novel, and of course working and moving on with my life.My chest is so stuffy from being on the train just now.An hour on a train coach without air cond was terrible! hopefully KTM have fixed their aircond , because I was literally in a steam room just now plus the body odour from people who never showered,it gave me headache, I was in agony just now, but driving is totally not for me.I am afraid of driving especially in kuala Lumpur,where the drivers will eat this naive me alive

Me, my nagging...a blog is a series of thoughts in my mind that burst suddenly on my head during my almost 2 hours wait for a taxi in KL sentral.

1)Dirty toilets in malls-I understand if the gent's are dirty but for ladies? show some grace!!I can't believe sometimes,especially when those using it are the so called stylo ladies with inches of make ups on their faces.So to my friends who are reading this..Don't call me a snob when I insist on going to the Hilton to eat, the toilets there are clean and so does At Pavilion my favourite shopping mall

2)Public transportation-Why do I have to bargain on taxi prices when they are metered?WHY,WHY WHY? why does taxi drivers loves bashing politicians and people of other races?it's not nice and definitely not the type of conversation you would want to have with people you hardly know.And not the type of conversation I would want to debate or discuss about when I am tired.Pay some respect towards other maybe they don't share the same political view .

3)Why taxi driver at Pavilion/KL Plaza/Bukit Bintang Plaza/KLCC is asking me for RM 30 (approx £5) for a ride that's less than 7 minutes?That's why for those who are in Bukit Bintang, head straight for Sungai Wang's taxi stand and those in KLCC just at Isetan's entrance where they sell handbags and shoes just take an exit by Polo Boutique and get a taxi there and before you get in make sure they start the metre.I don't mind to tip but don't abuse consumerism that's like robbing a person in the broad daylight.

4)Drive safely and politely.Ok, I heard ones from a guy who is also a road bully in the making on how woman should not drive if they are not willing to drive(selfishly) like a man.My mother is one helluva great driver and I am not.My phobia towards driving started when I was 19 (not too long ago) ,just gettin my driving licence ,I went to my neighbourhood's Dunkin Donuts, in Plaza Damansara what happened was a stupid garbage truck got into one way street where I was driving through, and got the car door and my mum had to pay RM 600 just to touch up the scratch made by the garbage truck as I was young at the time and less fiery ,I didn't want to have an argument in a dark parking basement, that was the most expensive donut I ever had in my entire life.So basically from that day , I looked at male drivers(and maybe few percents of female ones) as bullies.I can't deal with them therefore not joining them on the street.

5)C'mon we are Malaysian , we are caring (or who am I bullshitting here?) when we see pregnant woman on the train can we please ,please let her sit down.I have Lupus and my knees are aching constantly but when I see a kid I just have no heart to let the kid stand so I ended up standing in pain while some laddo , just sit down enjoying his Ipod with his Fitness first Gym backpack ... you know just heading to the gym for a great workout.

6)When we go to the Supermarket, they have express lane for people who are paying for less than 10 items , be courteous towards others and... 11 is not 10, 13 packs of similar flavour of maggie me PLUS 16 more grocery items are not 10.Therefore people who carries basket just to get a bottle of coffee like me won't have to wait and Thanks to a brave cashier at Carrefour Mid Valley by the name of Nurul today , these people learnt their lesson , she was very professional just now.Kudos.

7)Speaking for other fellow Malaysians in regards of bajet popular - give use some real life changing -"new budget", apa ni? harga rokok and minyak naik tapi gaji tak naik, gaji minimum pun takde?old story new title.None of my friends paid less than 20 ringgit for their electricity bills, and my disabled friends had been receiving RM 150 allowance every month all this while , so it is not something new , announcing same old things every year is not cool.Again this ain't political,it's just a point of view from a young Malaysian who does not smoke or drives a car.

Not ignorant at all
8)Thanks Mr and Mrs Thava for the presents, they gave me not one but two prezzies!!! I love them , it's lovely going out last night(as usual).

Just had my mum's fish head curry and that was lovely.
Enough of my nagging.....
I am tired , had a very long day and now heading to the bath for a relaxing lavender bath with my own handmade ylang-ylang soap
my new passion on the block - soap making :o) .

At least this guy put a smile on my face.

Thursday, 28 August 2008


I had a blast last night going out with my best friends and brother,it always nice to catch up with old friends especially when they flew over just to be with you.
great food , great time.This week so far makes me realized that I am indeed loved by people around me.Despite the tropic thunderstorm last night, we girls went out with our flip flops armed with umbrellas and ponchos , which reminds me of the time when me and Angel went to REM's concert years ago,and having to buy a poncho at £10 each, felt like the seller were slitting my neck at the time... but me , Angel,Su and D just carried on having a great time enjoying the concert in the rain,before Su puked outside the stadium(I am sorry Su I have to write that down!)
I can't believe that after so many years we are still like we were ,caring about each other so , so much and very protective of each other too!

Today, I made some stew for lunch and now waiting for my salmon for dinner to be ready.Hope it won't rain tonight as we are planning to be out again!with our stillettos this time of course.

My mum always say things and I always take it for granted just like I had treated other issues in my life."Treasure our friends especially when they are real friends",I was once that girl who thought that she don't need friends , she don't have friends... eventhough she knew it deep inside all this while that she has got GREAT friends who accept her as she is.Thank you for being my friend.

Wednesday, 27 August 2008

Curly Zu

When a man cut or change his hairstyle all that he got is a new look.For a girl when we got a new hairstyle, it come with attitude, new hair products and headache.
I, yesterday out of the blue went to get my hair curled at Ricky's and what I have now is a new attitude, snarl, smile and a slimmer looking face.Of course I need to go and get a super mask for my hair as it had been taking whole loads of abuse lately .They said smear some mayonnaise but I still believe in smelling good after washing my hair instead of smelling like eggs.

From wavy -smooth going all big and deliciously curly .I am happy with my new hairdo but I got scared if I go to sleep now, it will be flat and lost its bounce.

Happy so happy with my new look, I am not the boring goody two shoes Azura anymore.rarrr!

Tuesday, 26 August 2008

It's the thought that counts

As I had said I wasn't that thrilled for my birthday , but when the day hits me , I got many phone calls and text messages from allover the world .And my angel in England sent me a nice plant filled with cactus and I simply love it different from all these years where he sent me flowers like gorgeous roses and lillies(inter- flora loves him),in addition to diamond ring and necklace,camera,and all sorts of presents(xxxxxxx).I love it !, I love cactus ,I love plants and I love you.

To all my friends who had sent me text , messages on my emails, facebook, msn and cards, Phone calls -even my new friends in Langkawi rung ...What can I say, I am spoilt by your love!.I feel like my existence in this planet is appreciated.
Thank You ,I wish I can say party is over , but we are going out tomorrow to celebrate my birthday with friends who were not in KL yesterday and of course Miss M who is the champion ,coming back to Malaysia just for me as she got to work yesterday.

Many things had changed in this few years, but our friendship remains,friends forever?Yes indeed.

Lots of love

Sunday, 24 August 2008

Birthday chicas in the house

I have to write this quickly who would have thought that Monday can be such a hectic day ! sigh...Happy Birthday to Me and my darling blogger best friend, Miss Azra!Yes we indeed shares the same date of birth!no wonder we are crazy about each other! I got to know Azra through writing and of course I love reading her thoughts at this new place of hers >> Azra's blog , friendship knows no boundaries and places and who could have thought I would find girly bonding and friendship here !

Dear Azra ,Happy Birthday to you and me!!!!loads of love and speak soon.Thanks for always being here and supporting me and my blog Sayangku Azura
Lots of love

Saturday, 23 August 2008

I heard it's your birthday

So getting this for my 40th birthday

Last week I was thrilled for my birthday , I thought after all that I had been through I deserve to have all the bash(es)and parties.3 years ago i thought that's it , if m not breathing tomorrow i accept it.I never look at death as a tragedy, its metamorphosis and throughout that- I had experienced and turned into various shape, sized , looks etc.Thankfully this story of my life continues, I am alive today , I am here and that's all that matters.
I complained a lot in written and having sayangku azura now , this blog since late last year have become my best friend , something that I wake up to every morning, at least I have friends here and they are always here for me when I need them.

I shared the same birthday with my late father, I lost him when I was barely 11 and on the day i was born he got promoted so I was a gift to him , like a little present that later turn into the reason why he need aspirins and earplugs,Of course never celebrated anything after he died,whether its My birthday or Hari Raya I am running away from really celebrating it.Its not the same.I think that's how it have always been practised here in my house we celebrate things that we achieved like job promotions and such ,but we hardly celebrate birthdays.I don't have a clear reason why , it sort of comes naturally.For my mum's her birthday is only days after he died and for me, we shares the same birthdays.

In contrary to how I had felt last week , I got kind of reluctant to really talk about it this week , and I am not really that bothered anymore to have a birthday do,besides I had gone nuts twice this week with my friends, and work and family matters too has taken so much space in my head, that I have stop thinking of myself and only myself for few days now.
And being off working for people now, no colleagues will be here to give me prezzies and things,back then without me knowing it there are always shaking hands, cuddles,kisses , surprises and teddy bears- thank you guys ;).but this year I don't feel like it ( We don't know if I change my mind later ) Evaluating what I had and had not achieved in my life is making it worst, maybe I should just lie about my age!(then , I suddenly realized while typing this, that it might not be a bad idea)

Happy birthday(my good friends who are getting older in these few days to come)

Lindsey ,Susie, Marion,
I love you girls !xx

About the Author
The writer is still not sure if she is happy or not to be a year older on this coming August 25th.She thinks that she have not achieved much in her life and wish she had done more,Therefore to make up with the years wasted when she was ill and paralyzed she has decided that might as well lie about her age.

I am Azura , I am 22 years old *wink*

Your Birthdate: August 25

You excel at anything difficult or high tech.

In other words, you're a total (brilliant) geek.

It's difficult for you to find people worth spending time with.

Which is probably why you'll take over the world with your evil robots!

Your strength: Your unfailing logic

Your weakness: Loving machines more than people

Your power color: Tan

Your power symbol: Pi

Your power month: July

Sunday, 17 August 2008

I lost my glasses

I forgot to add to previous entry as I was busy earlier today.I lost my glasses in Langkawi, it was a gift from someone special, there goes another thousand ringgit to the bin ... arrggghhhh!!!

Love & Loath ,Langkawi.

Malaysians loves Langkawi , the white sand, sun and the duty free shopping.I prefers Tioman rather than Langkawi , but when duty calls I go where I have to go .

Rented a car as it would make my life easier in Langkawi.The car was in a terrible state with gear changing making loud noises, fuel meter not working , no power steering etc, despite its shiny outlook,advice :check on the car before you pay any deposit and ask for a test drive if you can.To make it even worse on the morning where we were rushing to the airport the car broke down in the middle of literally a jungle!
this is the good part....
I rung Langkawi's police station to seek for help, as I was afraid and mind you my windows were opened as well and I can't put it up again as my mum could not start the car!at 6.37 am , I had started to ring the station for three times until the ringin sound went off THREE TIMES and nobody picks up.I got the number from the Langkawi tourist map and the number was 04 9666222.It was really dark with no presence with any human being except for Monkeys.So I decided to ring our national emergency number, thats 999 at approximately 6.40 am and the answer that i ve got was:
"You can dial 103 (which is the national directory) and call for a tow truck."
The issue is I dont need a bloody tow truck as I already had rung the company where I rented my car from.I just need policeman to come and stay with me before I am being attacked or robbed in this dark secluded place maybe if the road light are working I would not be so afraid !.Just got the petrol car to do that!I had been in the same situation and the policeman stayed with me unil help arrives, Crime prevention anyone? .

This pavement ...its feakin dusty in Pantai Cenang , I am not sure if they will do a proper walkway or its going to be left like this forever.That was very dusty.

Where is the book village now?No book sanymore?what a shame !nice buldings , no functions.

The loaf, I love the Salmon Quiche at The Loaf in Pavilion and after a long humid drive we decided to have a cuppa here and then we realized that it was actually our lunch .Yep I forgot to eat lunch, can you believe that?While there I went on checking some yacht, and hope that i will be able to puchase one.

Matahari malay restaurant , where I had a wonderful dinner, the staffs were very nice Shasha, Fauzy and Kim thanks for being so friendly and food was nice too.I love the ambience and I think ambience has becoming the topmost element nowadays in setting up a good restaurant.

Bard's restaurant called Telaga Arabic down Pantai Cenang (Cenang Beach) Where I had some fish briyani and it was delicious.I forgot to take any pictures because I was to busy talking and eating.great service and Thanks for dessert .xo

Beach life.

Some nice bulding , empty airport and goodbye Langkawi , See you in few weeks.