Sunday, 31 August 2008

The chain reaction

Yes , the story and the picture are seldom related.. welcome to my blog

when you are feeling ill and have a low spirit want to fight , you want to be strong.But when you failed, You are down in the dump and it leads to chain reaction which is your nose start bleeding and your eyes blurred.I am tired and I am sleepy all the time.I tried sleeping but when I got up my temperature risen.I am not well.Healing my spirit and soul now.

Lupus 1 Azura 0

Friday, 29 August 2008

Me ,my nagging .... a blog

Starting from today, I will be very busy with finishing and touching up my first ever novel, and of course working and moving on with my life.My chest is so stuffy from being on the train just now.An hour on a train coach without air cond was terrible! hopefully KTM have fixed their aircond , because I was literally in a steam room just now plus the body odour from people who never showered,it gave me headache, I was in agony just now, but driving is totally not for me.I am afraid of driving especially in kuala Lumpur,where the drivers will eat this naive me alive

Me, my nagging...a blog is a series of thoughts in my mind that burst suddenly on my head during my almost 2 hours wait for a taxi in KL sentral.

1)Dirty toilets in malls-I understand if the gent's are dirty but for ladies? show some grace!!I can't believe sometimes,especially when those using it are the so called stylo ladies with inches of make ups on their faces.So to my friends who are reading this..Don't call me a snob when I insist on going to the Hilton to eat, the toilets there are clean and so does At Pavilion my favourite shopping mall

2)Public transportation-Why do I have to bargain on taxi prices when they are metered?WHY,WHY WHY? why does taxi drivers loves bashing politicians and people of other races?it's not nice and definitely not the type of conversation you would want to have with people you hardly know.And not the type of conversation I would want to debate or discuss about when I am tired.Pay some respect towards other maybe they don't share the same political view .

3)Why taxi driver at Pavilion/KL Plaza/Bukit Bintang Plaza/KLCC is asking me for RM 30 (approx £5) for a ride that's less than 7 minutes?That's why for those who are in Bukit Bintang, head straight for Sungai Wang's taxi stand and those in KLCC just at Isetan's entrance where they sell handbags and shoes just take an exit by Polo Boutique and get a taxi there and before you get in make sure they start the metre.I don't mind to tip but don't abuse consumerism that's like robbing a person in the broad daylight.

4)Drive safely and politely.Ok, I heard ones from a guy who is also a road bully in the making on how woman should not drive if they are not willing to drive(selfishly) like a man.My mother is one helluva great driver and I am not.My phobia towards driving started when I was 19 (not too long ago) ,just gettin my driving licence ,I went to my neighbourhood's Dunkin Donuts, in Plaza Damansara what happened was a stupid garbage truck got into one way street where I was driving through, and got the car door and my mum had to pay RM 600 just to touch up the scratch made by the garbage truck as I was young at the time and less fiery ,I didn't want to have an argument in a dark parking basement, that was the most expensive donut I ever had in my entire life.So basically from that day , I looked at male drivers(and maybe few percents of female ones) as bullies.I can't deal with them therefore not joining them on the street.

5)C'mon we are Malaysian , we are caring (or who am I bullshitting here?) when we see pregnant woman on the train can we please ,please let her sit down.I have Lupus and my knees are aching constantly but when I see a kid I just have no heart to let the kid stand so I ended up standing in pain while some laddo , just sit down enjoying his Ipod with his Fitness first Gym backpack ... you know just heading to the gym for a great workout.

6)When we go to the Supermarket, they have express lane for people who are paying for less than 10 items , be courteous towards others and... 11 is not 10, 13 packs of similar flavour of maggie me PLUS 16 more grocery items are not 10.Therefore people who carries basket just to get a bottle of coffee like me won't have to wait and Thanks to a brave cashier at Carrefour Mid Valley by the name of Nurul today , these people learnt their lesson , she was very professional just now.Kudos.

7)Speaking for other fellow Malaysians in regards of bajet popular - give use some real life changing -"new budget", apa ni? harga rokok and minyak naik tapi gaji tak naik, gaji minimum pun takde?old story new title.None of my friends paid less than 20 ringgit for their electricity bills, and my disabled friends had been receiving RM 150 allowance every month all this while , so it is not something new , announcing same old things every year is not cool.Again this ain't political,it's just a point of view from a young Malaysian who does not smoke or drives a car.

Not ignorant at all
8)Thanks Mr and Mrs Thava for the presents, they gave me not one but two prezzies!!! I love them , it's lovely going out last night(as usual).

Just had my mum's fish head curry and that was lovely.
Enough of my nagging.....
I am tired , had a very long day and now heading to the bath for a relaxing lavender bath with my own handmade ylang-ylang soap
my new passion on the block - soap making :o) .

At least this guy put a smile on my face.

Thursday, 28 August 2008


I had a blast last night going out with my best friends and brother,it always nice to catch up with old friends especially when they flew over just to be with you.
great food , great time.This week so far makes me realized that I am indeed loved by people around me.Despite the tropic thunderstorm last night, we girls went out with our flip flops armed with umbrellas and ponchos , which reminds me of the time when me and Angel went to REM's concert years ago,and having to buy a poncho at £10 each, felt like the seller were slitting my neck at the time... but me , Angel,Su and D just carried on having a great time enjoying the concert in the rain,before Su puked outside the stadium(I am sorry Su I have to write that down!)
I can't believe that after so many years we are still like we were ,caring about each other so , so much and very protective of each other too!

Today, I made some stew for lunch and now waiting for my salmon for dinner to be ready.Hope it won't rain tonight as we are planning to be out again!with our stillettos this time of course.

My mum always say things and I always take it for granted just like I had treated other issues in my life."Treasure our friends especially when they are real friends",I was once that girl who thought that she don't need friends , she don't have friends... eventhough she knew it deep inside all this while that she has got GREAT friends who accept her as she is.Thank you for being my friend.

Wednesday, 27 August 2008

Curly Zu

When a man cut or change his hairstyle all that he got is a new look.For a girl when we got a new hairstyle, it come with attitude, new hair products and headache.
I, yesterday out of the blue went to get my hair curled at Ricky's and what I have now is a new attitude, snarl, smile and a slimmer looking face.Of course I need to go and get a super mask for my hair as it had been taking whole loads of abuse lately .They said smear some mayonnaise but I still believe in smelling good after washing my hair instead of smelling like eggs.

From wavy -smooth going all big and deliciously curly .I am happy with my new hairdo but I got scared if I go to sleep now, it will be flat and lost its bounce.

Happy so happy with my new look, I am not the boring goody two shoes Azura anymore.rarrr!

Tuesday, 26 August 2008

It's the thought that counts

As I had said I wasn't that thrilled for my birthday , but when the day hits me , I got many phone calls and text messages from allover the world .And my angel in England sent me a nice plant filled with cactus and I simply love it different from all these years where he sent me flowers like gorgeous roses and lillies(inter- flora loves him),in addition to diamond ring and necklace,camera,and all sorts of presents(xxxxxxx).I love it !, I love cactus ,I love plants and I love you.

To all my friends who had sent me text , messages on my emails, facebook, msn and cards, Phone calls -even my new friends in Langkawi rung ...What can I say, I am spoilt by your love!.I feel like my existence in this planet is appreciated.
Thank You ,I wish I can say party is over , but we are going out tomorrow to celebrate my birthday with friends who were not in KL yesterday and of course Miss M who is the champion ,coming back to Malaysia just for me as she got to work yesterday.

Many things had changed in this few years, but our friendship remains,friends forever?Yes indeed.

Lots of love

Sunday, 24 August 2008

Birthday chicas in the house

I have to write this quickly who would have thought that Monday can be such a hectic day ! sigh...Happy Birthday to Me and my darling blogger best friend, Miss Azra!Yes we indeed shares the same date of birth!no wonder we are crazy about each other! I got to know Azra through writing and of course I love reading her thoughts at this new place of hers >> Azra's blog , friendship knows no boundaries and places and who could have thought I would find girly bonding and friendship here !

Dear Azra ,Happy Birthday to you and me!!!!loads of love and speak soon.Thanks for always being here and supporting me and my blog Sayangku Azura
Lots of love

Saturday, 23 August 2008

I heard it's your birthday

So getting this for my 40th birthday

Last week I was thrilled for my birthday , I thought after all that I had been through I deserve to have all the bash(es)and parties.3 years ago i thought that's it , if m not breathing tomorrow i accept it.I never look at death as a tragedy, its metamorphosis and throughout that- I had experienced and turned into various shape, sized , looks etc.Thankfully this story of my life continues, I am alive today , I am here and that's all that matters.
I complained a lot in written and having sayangku azura now , this blog since late last year have become my best friend , something that I wake up to every morning, at least I have friends here and they are always here for me when I need them.

I shared the same birthday with my late father, I lost him when I was barely 11 and on the day i was born he got promoted so I was a gift to him , like a little present that later turn into the reason why he need aspirins and earplugs,Of course never celebrated anything after he died,whether its My birthday or Hari Raya I am running away from really celebrating it.Its not the same.I think that's how it have always been practised here in my house we celebrate things that we achieved like job promotions and such ,but we hardly celebrate birthdays.I don't have a clear reason why , it sort of comes naturally.For my mum's her birthday is only days after he died and for me, we shares the same birthdays.

In contrary to how I had felt last week , I got kind of reluctant to really talk about it this week , and I am not really that bothered anymore to have a birthday do,besides I had gone nuts twice this week with my friends, and work and family matters too has taken so much space in my head, that I have stop thinking of myself and only myself for few days now.
And being off working for people now, no colleagues will be here to give me prezzies and things,back then without me knowing it there are always shaking hands, cuddles,kisses , surprises and teddy bears- thank you guys ;).but this year I don't feel like it ( We don't know if I change my mind later ) Evaluating what I had and had not achieved in my life is making it worst, maybe I should just lie about my age!(then , I suddenly realized while typing this, that it might not be a bad idea)

Happy birthday(my good friends who are getting older in these few days to come)

Lindsey ,Susie, Marion,
I love you girls !xx

About the Author
The writer is still not sure if she is happy or not to be a year older on this coming August 25th.She thinks that she have not achieved much in her life and wish she had done more,Therefore to make up with the years wasted when she was ill and paralyzed she has decided that might as well lie about her age.

I am Azura , I am 22 years old *wink*

Your Birthdate: August 25

You excel at anything difficult or high tech.

In other words, you're a total (brilliant) geek.

It's difficult for you to find people worth spending time with.

Which is probably why you'll take over the world with your evil robots!

Your strength: Your unfailing logic

Your weakness: Loving machines more than people

Your power color: Tan

Your power symbol: Pi

Your power month: July

Sunday, 17 August 2008

I lost my glasses

I forgot to add to previous entry as I was busy earlier today.I lost my glasses in Langkawi, it was a gift from someone special, there goes another thousand ringgit to the bin ... arrggghhhh!!!

Love & Loath ,Langkawi.

Malaysians loves Langkawi , the white sand, sun and the duty free shopping.I prefers Tioman rather than Langkawi , but when duty calls I go where I have to go .

Rented a car as it would make my life easier in Langkawi.The car was in a terrible state with gear changing making loud noises, fuel meter not working , no power steering etc, despite its shiny outlook,advice :check on the car before you pay any deposit and ask for a test drive if you can.To make it even worse on the morning where we were rushing to the airport the car broke down in the middle of literally a jungle!
this is the good part....
I rung Langkawi's police station to seek for help, as I was afraid and mind you my windows were opened as well and I can't put it up again as my mum could not start the car!at 6.37 am , I had started to ring the station for three times until the ringin sound went off THREE TIMES and nobody picks up.I got the number from the Langkawi tourist map and the number was 04 9666222.It was really dark with no presence with any human being except for Monkeys.So I decided to ring our national emergency number, thats 999 at approximately 6.40 am and the answer that i ve got was:
"You can dial 103 (which is the national directory) and call for a tow truck."
The issue is I dont need a bloody tow truck as I already had rung the company where I rented my car from.I just need policeman to come and stay with me before I am being attacked or robbed in this dark secluded place maybe if the road light are working I would not be so afraid !.Just got the petrol car to do that!I had been in the same situation and the policeman stayed with me unil help arrives, Crime prevention anyone? .

This pavement ...its feakin dusty in Pantai Cenang , I am not sure if they will do a proper walkway or its going to be left like this forever.That was very dusty.

Where is the book village now?No book sanymore?what a shame !nice buldings , no functions.

The loaf, I love the Salmon Quiche at The Loaf in Pavilion and after a long humid drive we decided to have a cuppa here and then we realized that it was actually our lunch .Yep I forgot to eat lunch, can you believe that?While there I went on checking some yacht, and hope that i will be able to puchase one.

Matahari malay restaurant , where I had a wonderful dinner, the staffs were very nice Shasha, Fauzy and Kim thanks for being so friendly and food was nice too.I love the ambience and I think ambience has becoming the topmost element nowadays in setting up a good restaurant.

Bard's restaurant called Telaga Arabic down Pantai Cenang (Cenang Beach) Where I had some fish briyani and it was delicious.I forgot to take any pictures because I was to busy talking and eating.great service and Thanks for dessert .xo

Beach life.

Some nice bulding , empty airport and goodbye Langkawi , See you in few weeks.

Wednesday, 13 August 2008

And the Arte Y Pico goes to....

Arte Y Pico award

I am really pleased to have been awarded by my gorgeous friend Michelle at Life In The Autoimmune Lane.Her blog provides infos of autoimmune diseases as well as the trials and tribulations of having one.
Thanks a lot for this award and it means a lot to me.I am very happy to pass it on . All of them write about their personal experiences and they they do it in a fun and yet honest manner.Here we go...

These are the rules of the award,

1. Choose five blogs you consider deserving of this award. (Creativity, interesting material, etc.)

2. Each award includes the name of the owner of the blog and his/her link

3. Each award winner has to show the award and put the name and link to the blog that has given her or him the award itself

4. Award winner and the one who has given the prize have to show the link of “Arte y Pico” blog, so everyone will know the origin of this award.

I would like to present you all with this prestigious Arte Y Pico award!!

I think , his blog is witty and his ideas and opinions are original besides I like his cute little boy.

I enjoy reading his thoughts and life in Yogjakarta.

It's her little journal, of course its original and creative!

I love reading about her life in Brunei and I like those vibrant pictures too!

Dr Hannan
He will be so busy and have no time to visit blogs, but I really enjoy reading this Doctor's blog and his life journey and dreams

I'm leaving for my short Island getaway break /working in few hours , So... see you guys soon!

Lots of love xoxo


Monday, 11 August 2008

Yesterday once more

Thats me and my idol Dr Kassim Ahmad and his Wife, during our breakfast .

I could not sleep last saturday ,nope I wasn't out, stayed in .After last Saturday I got this feeling that everything will be alright with my life.Not that it 's not alright.I am only human and human can never be satisfied with what they got.All of my life thinking I was abnormal ,when there are no rules or guide book telling what is normal and what is not.

I was feeling rather unfortunate with whats going on with my life, and injustice that I had witnessed in this world make it even worse.I have to admit that despite my ability to console myself, going through this life is very difficult.I don't know why I was chosen but now, I am glad that I was picked to face what I had gone through.

My life changed after reading Kassim Ahmad's memoir, He fought and never questions, that's how life should be... we take one day at a time, we don't ask , we embrace.We are human after all.I turned the final page of his book and I feel what He felt.A present from my mother turned out to be a token to break me free from my own little grey clouds.

Pak Kassim , Thank you for your time and for the autographs.So very kind of you to meet me and your kind words will always be in my heart.You are such a role model,You have taught me that its OK to be different, It's OK for them to criticize you and to stand by my principles , and to be humble no matter how far who had gone to in life.I will never forget The morning with you and your kind wife.
I was born many years after Dr Kassim Ahmad ,but I can never get into Kassim Ahmad's ideas and mind, I looked up at him and think he is brilliant, while me, I know I am different and people often said I am different, but I neither speak much of my mind nor write articulately.
Many things should be left unsaid here, but his memoir is not to be debate about, its for one to read , understand and appreciate the journey of a scholar , a thinker ,Who often had been mistreated just because He is different.When it is different, it is wrong especially to conservative , shallow minds.

He made me look at myself again in the mirror today and for once in many many years I feel beautiful and not ugly and scarred like I used to.From one human being to another, Thank you Pak Kassim.

I am different indeed. Deal with it.

NOTE:Michelle, Thank You for the award !appreciate them and will write soon about them.More entries coming this week.So Stay tuned.

Az Azura

Friday, 8 August 2008

I love to go jalan -jalan

After paying my phone and Internet bills at the Telekom's office, My partner in crime who is my mother and I suddenly decided to head to The Central Market Kuala Lumpur .Central Market as usual is filled with people who were browsing and I and my mother have not been in there for ages.So, it is really nice to go again and see the changes that had been done by the new building management .This place is not far from Kuala Lumpur's Chinatown, and there are many artist displaying and selling their works name it little handmade souvenirs , T-shirts, printworks, potrait,silversmithing, memorabilia and antiques.... well, almost anything you can think of really!I got Jaz and Anji a little trinket case , something from the weaving shop and hope they will like it.Just going to wait for them to come back from their holiday and I will DHL it to these two beautiful girls.

While we were there, we found a little Cafe called "Malay tea house" and it is quite a place not only serving food but also Malay herbal beverages such as Tongkat Ali coffee (Tongkat Ali is said to be an aphrodisiac ?,I am not really sure) and all sorts of Malay herbal teas.But most of all the guy who served us was really kind ,I said I will bring my friend there yesterday , but it was raining so heavily and we were stuck in my favourite mall having many rounds of coffees and ice creams and ended up having a meal while waiting for the rain to stop.These are some of the pictures taken the day before yesterday when I was at The Central Market Kuala Lumpur.Before we headed back home that day ,we dropped by at our florist nearby and got some beautiful lillies to put on our console table.

Arrays of potrait /caricature artistes

As we Malays eat with our hands, these little basin and water jug is used to rinse our hands before meal.

Products sold at The cafe

I know I said coffee, but I ended up eating A Nasi lemak and 2 types of desserts.ooopps..

Check out the red triangle dome on the table,its called "tudung saji" which means food cover , yes we covers our food with that.

*Jalan jalan means to go for a walk/browsing

Saturday, 2 August 2008

It’s my blog ,and I can cry or whine if I want to

From my Monday till today my head is filled with questions .
Some people had left me in vain and vague, name it personal or business matters.
I think what I had been thinking about this week was a total bloody waste of time and I rather use the time for something more productive. Mind over matter? it’s more like emotions over matter. My heart rules my life, it always does and it got me into trouble many times.I hate waiting .Therefore I turned this computer on and start writing while listening to "Funeral of Hearts" which is my favourite song and the melody kind of inspires me to do many things at least when I am moving ,I'm focus on something else and tends to forget all this questions and thoughts in my head.

As someone said to me yesterday, “you only think about work, worries, chocolate and what to eat next”. That was hilarious and I would like to thank this person in Nottingham for that piece of advice on how we were born , and later we die and what’s in between does not matter. As simple as that it will all be gone, That is his meaning of life or maybe he was just concern about me and what I’m up to .I think we all agree that as much as simple as that, I wish I can do something remarkable while I am still breathing, at least at my funeral someone will say “hey! she did this thing and its good”.

On the other note …worries and emotions aside, I am always tired , I think my new fitness regime is sucking all my energy and my knee cap hurts since yesterday.I feel like staying in bed all day but I got to wake up as it is Saturday.
I am just hoping that all this turmoil in my life will be over soon , Will these questions in my head be answered? Only time will tell …arrrgghhh! Time and waiting is not my favourite word, I know what I want and I want it NOW! But if I never get the answers I understand,that life is filled with unanswered questions and it’s best to just let it go and forgotten.Sometimes you get what you want and sometimes you don’t.

I am off to join my mum for our movie rerun of Koizora –The sky of love, a sad tale of first and true love...I need a good cry anyway.

Have a great weekend ! xx

Note:I can't add a picture here, does anyone know why?The icon where it says add image is not on my page.. sigh.. sorry you can't enjoy my often irrelevant picture.