Monday, 10 December 2007

welcome back


Eventhough its a cloudy day today I feel much happier than days had passed.For lunch, I ate some Steamed Broccolli and Masak Singgang ( a yummy fish soup with spices )that my mother cooked earlier.I have lupus you see, there are few things that I can't eat and Thank god the food that I can't eat are not even nice tasting food .My romance with food can't be denied but now that Im on steroids ,I seems to put on weight quite fast ,compared to before Lupus, when I can eat 1 whole chicken , Ice creams and cakes so frequently and still be Miss petite and tiny.

I am currently working on a project and to be honest, I have not start a single thing yet , I wish I could blame people for it , people who took my time by hurting me and made me think 'what I've done wrong' or 'is it just me' and all the questions thats leading to self blaming .But I think today Ive got the answer , some women are competitive and likes to compete in every aspect ,every arena of our lives, Whenever we meet this kind of people stay away from them because they are insecure people and insecurity is contagious.

The story here is, a women who has everything brags about what she has got and pointed out on what I don't have and she did this often.I don't feel defeated and at one point I was even happy for her and glad she got everything that she wanted but I am just frustrated on how she could say things that she had said.I was stunned by how rude can civilised people get.
But now ,I want to blame myself and I want to change , before this my life were filled with marshmallows and chocolate muffins and those are my friends people whom are sweet until I met this person where my life turned grey and salty .Now I realized what my boyfriend's father(Rod) and even my own mother had reminded me from time to time...


NOT TO LET PEOPLE WALK ALL OVER YOU, because once they starts doing it to you and you forgave them , they will do it to you over and over again.. my boyfriend's father and my mum are wise, wise people and I regret not listening to them, and I made a vow to change how I feel and now I am inhaling good energy already
And now I am back to being productive again doing the storyboard for my project and gonna be working on them after I finish this.Suddenly my world thats pink in colour is filled with marshmallows and chocolate muffins again...

You are a No Drama Mama!

No need for drama, you just chill out and don't let things bother you
You've got a peaceful, zen-like attitude... even when things get crazy
You're a pleasure to be around, and you have lots of friends to show for it
You don't need to be the center of attention, you're happy enough as is!

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